This post apoc-olympic fantasy horror biopic sequel to The Greatest Tory Ever Told (2008), charts the early rise of Boris Johnson through the eyes of his alien hairdresser, Wenlock.  It is 2009 and having been dispatched by his masters to destroy the Earth, Wenlock finds himself woefully ill-equipped to deal with the realities of political life but ironically achieves some local popularity after his crash-landing annihilates most of Stratford.

THE NEVER ENDING TORY

Equally ill-equipped to become a hairdresser (his race have no hair, no binocular vision and only two fingers on each hand), he finds himself sponsored into this bizarre role by the newly elected Mayor who promises Wenlock that his destiny is far more conservative than he could ever have imagined: this is a world without end. Boris also makes Wenlock his official Apoc-olympic mascot.

WENLOCK LEDGE

After Johnson’s self-acclaimed success with the London Apoc-olympics, Wenlock tries unsuccessfully to talk the Mayor off the ledge of pursuing the highest office in the land. Having invoked a wormhole to Wenlock’s home planet of Cameronpatsi in the Brexit Nebulous, Johnson pulls off an unthinkable coup d’etat by unleashing the fabled Brexit Leviathan housed in an electric bus covered in strange runic proclamations. Eerily, none of the proclamations turn out to be true but the bus actually works.

SAD TAX TOO

Now Prime Minister and having always justified his motives by saying, “I’m just getting more Duty”, Boris is out of control. Wenlock realises only too late that Johnson has been manipulating the very fabric of his suits and has failed to understand a basic rule of the universe – that of VAT and anti-VAT. When VAT is applied to Import Duty it doesn’t actually produce anything or create jobs. Potentially the Dark Matter that IS created will destroy the world.

I AM GENERAL LEDGER

With his master’s increasingly self-styled hair, Wenlock is effectively out of a job. Alienated and an alien, he gives two fingers to hairdressing, politics and the Apoc-olympics and chooses life on the road. Living rough and drinking a bottle of Suntory whisky every day, he finds that every 4 years he morphs into a new Olympic Mascot. Waking up in Tokyo in 2021 he is shocked to discover that everyone believes it is still 2020 and that he is the only one who can remember Take That.